This Is What Breakthrough Means to Me
And then something incredible happened.
Twelve more men jumped in — one after another — each offering either a phone call or words of encouragement.
by Steve Vogel
Just a couple of months ago, a new class of men completed their Breakthrough workshop. These are fresh alumni — still integrating the experience, still building the habits of openness and connection that this work calls for.
The other night, one of these men reached out to our group chat — about fifteen of us who went through the class together and have stayed connected.
His message was honest and vulnerable:
“Hey guys, I’m struggling tonight. It’s been a rough day in the marriage department, and I’m slipping into beating myself up over my part in it. I definitely fell into a few old pre-Breakthrough patterns, and my confidence is shaken. If anyone could offer support — something you’ve seen me do well or where you’ve seen me grow — it would mean a lot.”
(shared with permission)
Before I could even respond, another man offered to call him right away. I added, “I’m happy to offer a call anytime tonight.”
And then something incredible happened.
Twelve more men jumped in — one after another — each offering either a phone call or words of encouragement. Every message was personal and heartfelt, naming the strengths and growth they’d seen in him. No clichés, no quick fixes — just genuine brotherhood.
About an hour and a half later, I got a message:
“Do you have a minute for that call?”
Of course I did. I told him to give me five minutes, then we connected.
When we talked, he shared that the outpouring of love had already changed everything. He didn’t need a crisis call anymore. He’d spent the last hour and a half talking to different men from the group, just receiving — the presence, the care, the affirmation.
He told me he couldn’t believe every man responded so quickly, and with such depth.
That’s what moved me most. These weren’t longtime alumni or men who’ve been doing this work for decades. These were new graduates — men who had only completed their Breakthrough workshop weeks ago. And yet, the connection, the courage, and the compassion were already there.
That night reminded me exactly why I do this work.
Because this — this willingness to reach out, to respond, to hold one another with presence and love — is what Breakthrough is all about.
When a man says, “I’m struggling,” and a dozen others show up for him, that’s the power of community. That’s the living proof that something real happens here.
This is what Breakthrough means to me.
This is why I continue to do this work.
